I’m overwhelmed by so much these days, mostly by how much I miss you. I can’t see an end to this sadness. 

Honestly, I don’t even want an end to this feeling. It’s all I am capable of feeling right now, and thinking about feeling different in the future means looking into a future without you. Even thinking about not feeling sad someday, makes me sad. 

If I think of tomorrow, the tears flow. If I think of yesterday the tears flow. If I smell your clothes, if I hear a song you liked, if people talk about you, if people don’t talk about you, if I allow my mind to be still, if it’s too loud in the house, if it’s too quiet in the house, if I see your bike, if I see your keys, your wallet, your phone, if I wake up in the night and realize you’re not in the bed with me, the tears flow.

Oh, God. The tears… 

One thought on “I’m overwhelmed by so much these days

  1. read all your recent posts,sitting here reading and missing that devious smile,loved him so.stay strong, love you

    Liked by 1 person

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